That’s David Banner.

Yesterday, there was a gamma ray burst that may have been visible to the naked eye. Gamma ray bursts can be very scary things. The amount of energy that they realize is something that just cannot simply be imagined. However, they are weird phenomena. I would expect a star blowing up to release energy in all directions, but this doesn’t happen.

For those more interested in this gamma ray burst, here is an article (with a photo of the light). Even though the light is just reaching us now, the star that exploded was 7.5 billion light years away. That means 3 billion years before our solar system was in its current form, this star blew up. And it is just now reaching us. That is crazy!! I would also imagine that there were no objects in space that was in the line of path of the light for us to see it. No asteroids, comets, planets, space junk, American flags or babies for this light to deflect off of. I can only imagine the odds of us seeing this light were pretty low.

I would have been satisfied just seeing this event without capturing it. Because only by witnessing some sort of a gamma explosion could I have transformed into The Hulk.

Which begs the question, what H!P member would make the most convincing Hulk? Well it’s not going to be Edward Norton.

I don’t know my comics history when it comes to The Hulk, so I’m sure to do a certain somebody wrong with this entry.

What do we know about The Hulk?

He’s green.

While his skin color hasn’t been uniform in his entire life, it is an easy stereotype to call The Hulk green. So who is green in H!P? The 8th gen has been around a year now, so there aren’t many rookies left (CJ will get this). Let’s use a recent entry by Celestia to look at Team Green.

Risa Niigaki: I don’t see Hulk at all in Risa. A big, bulging character Risa is not.

LinLin: LinLin is definitely unique like The Hulk. She is a loud idol and can scare away little kids.

Airi Suzuki: She’s too nice, no way.

Yurina Kumai: A beast of an idol, Yurina’s height will definitely make her seem Hulkish over the other H!P idols. I would say that out of Team Green, Yurina is the most like The Hulk.

He causes destruction.

Ai Kago: Arguably, Aibon has become the most destructive force in H!P’s history. Because she just loves to smoke, she has caused the end of W and her idol career. Taking down a music group on the verge of releasing an album and going against a very large and devoted fan base.

Ai Takahashi: Ai Kago may have killed a group in an instant, but She Who Tainted Mini Moni showed she had a knack for the long term destruction of a group.

Natsumi Abe: She is seemingly clueless to her destructive nature (especially to turtles and bicyclists), which may make her all the more dangerous.

He has a split personality.

Reina Tanaka: When we first saw Reina, she was this cool and hip young teen. Now, she is over 18 and unbelievably annoying. What happened?

Rika Ishikawa: Referring to the recorded backstage comments, she is one of the few that we know her real personality is definitely is stark contrast with her idol personality.

Everyone is out to get him.

Megumi Murakami: The conspiracy theorist in me wouldn’t be surprised to see Megu turned in by one of her own.

Chinami Tokunaga: This is the only explanation that I can muster for why Chinami is overlooked in the Berryz Koubou pecking order.

Chisato Okai: Same reason as Chinami.

So after our extensive scientific and analytical data research, who can we claim is the Hulkiest of Hello!Project? Who most resembles this man:

Only one can fit this.